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Two ways to beat toxic stress

By Jane Kingsu-Cheng

Childbirth doula, Irina Otmakhova, Maricel Cua of The Parenting Emporium, and baby sleeping coach, Gabrielle Weil.

Childbirth doula, Irina Otmakhova, Maricel Cua of The Parenting Emporium, and baby sleeping coach, Gabrielle Weil.

Stress will always be there, and it will never go away. What matters is how we deal with them every single day.

“To master your stress, you first have to master your mind.” Ning Barcelo-Tadena cited this quote at a private seminar held recently by ASCOF Kids and The Parenting Emporium.

Tadena found blessings during her lowest moments. One of those was when she had mom resentment, where she felt she lost herself and had no identity. Instead of feeling sorry for herself, she pushed herself to learn makeup and led her to write a prayer book. Another one is when she discovered she had stage four endometriosis, which is a disease that affects the uterus. She went through rejection and regrets of being a woman, but she realized she had to start taking better care of herself. “I connected me to so many wonderful healers, and encouraged myself to study to become a Medical Intuitive–theta healer. It also inspired me to become a motivational speaker and author, and reminded me to celebrate my femininity and look at it in a better perspective.  This started my advocacy of unlocking the diva in people, and helped improve my relationships with my son, my husband and my entire family,” she reveals.

She was able to make something good come out of her problems. From becoming a professional makeup artist, to a healer and an Enneagram executive coach, this motivational speaker and corporate trainer is now an author of  Unlock the Diva, too! How did she do it?

It’s true that it stress is all in the mind. Easy to say, but hard to do. A major task that requires a change of mindset and rewire how one thinks. Tadena shows us how to kickstart a new thought process with these tips on how to avoid stress:

1. Find the blessing in the pain. 

Always view things in a better perspective, so that we feel lighter and things seem brighter. The more we shift our focus on what we are learning and the blessings that these experiences bring, the more our days becoming lighter and brighter. As parents, we pass this on to our children. You will notice that it will be easier for them to cope with daily stresses, too.

2. Stretch, not stress.

My mentor Carelle Mangaliag advised me to go further and completely change the word “stress” to “stretch,” so that the meaning behind the experience changes as well.  When we stretch, we become more flexible and develop strength. We reach farther than we have ever reached before and that is how we release toxic stress in our lives. The difference between the two is that stress drains and hinders us from taking positive action. Stretch energizes and helps us move forward.


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